Romance is not necessary for action. Freedom is. Once you are free to act one needs very little coaxing, very little reason to move.
Therefore, how does a man act from one layer of motive and keep deep feelings like love and connection important?
I refuse to slip back into my old macho ways without dragging some enlightenment down off of my meditative mountain.
Maybe there will be a time to catch one’s breath and enter the sacred realm of intimacy, but for now, as almost always, there isn’t the necessity for it.
You see, romance is imperative when you are choosing which partner to steal away from the dance floor to get to know them on a deeper level.
“Where’d you learn the tango?”
Action, conversely, is mandatory if you haven’t yet decided when you can leave the nest. Or the new normal: the second nest.
Sadly some are on their third or fourth nest.
A nest being a place where you are of adult age, yet you rely on another adult to be head of household. This does not apply to married couples, that is not a nest, that is a family.
The point is the question. And the question is; can you grow in initiative without throwing away your inner conflicts, demons, and angels without requiring that you act from a complex, universal… motive?
The real question is: does action come quicker when a motive is based on Naturalism or Romanticism?
Natural motives are one and whole. Romantic motives are layered (…like Ogres).
If one dives too low, they may psychologically convince (psych) themselves not to act. The more they inquire, the longer they hesitate.
In sports, this is unacceptable. “Why am I kicking this penalty kick? Is it because Flash couldn’t do it? What about Kengsinton? He’s much better. But then why am I not Flash or Kengsinton? Besides birth, I am less skilled. Why do men with less skill always end up kicking the penalty kick?”
By the time this futbol player has landed on his personal depth of the question, the game has moved on without him and he is given his own penalty violation.
Hence my preference for the Naturalist way. One layer of motive is all that is necessary, otherwise less will be done, and more will be thought of getting done.
“You have 1 hour to cook the most delicious Beef Wellington.”
“Don’t think about it, just say yes.”
“Yes! Yes, I will marry you.”
And so on.
The real dialogue at play in my head is; “Am I free enough to live my life, day in, and day out?”
To that, I must reply: “How many reasons do you need, lad?”
Clock’s a-tickin’, innit?